Qingxiao went out and drove the car directly into the Boston red light district
Almost as soon as he went out, he felt regretful. Then he did not turn around, but instead accelerated his pace. He stepped on the accelerator and stepped on the end of his heart. He felt like an evil fire was burning in his heart. Seeing the car overtaking, he took the lead, his long hair fluttered in the wind, and the anger that had been depressed for several days poured out at this moment.
He likes to drive fast trains, just like he likes sex speed and power, the wildness of life and the temptation of death, he has been able to experience the perfect sense of conquest brought by the speed of the car, which is the best satisfying man's vanity. Listen to the engine roaring, feel the wind whistling by the ears, and the scenery flashing by the road is like a condensed life. He wants to surpass, want to break through, and want to drive fast train to recover those passing time.
However, after all, there is no time limit, there are red lights and traffic jams. There are traffic rules here to be followed, and there are objective laws there. It is helpless that even though the sky is high and the earth is vast, there are countless tangible and invisible shackles and ropes between the world, which are bound to move between free will and the theorem of the world. Who can move calmly and freely?
The speed of the car had to slow down, and then the tall body curled up in the narrow carriage, and people breathed in dust and exhaust gas, and they existed
Yes, not life, just existence
No dreams, no hope, no family, no career
He didn't know how long this state would last, maybe three years, maybe thirty years, maybe a lifetime
Yu's road to recovery seems to be longer than saving his lover from the tiger's den, and he sees less hope.
He trembled for this
Is this the love he has fought for? The man in the room was covered with feathered skin. Well, even if some places have feathered qualities, he never has feathered souls at all costs, and he endured all the hardships in order to spend his whole life guarding such a stranger, and then look for the shadow of his past lover in that person every day?
But if he gives up now, why is he doing so much?
The time that cannot be recovered, the past that cannot be recovered may have been destined. Just at that bloody dusk, when he left Yu on the stage and was ruined by animals, perhaps earlier, when he saw the junior brother who was melancholy and straight on his back at Harvard campus...
Is it fate or disaster that he meets him?
Is it responsibility or love that he guards him?
I can't tell whether I am resentful or angry, so when he brought a male prostitute to bed, he had no sympathy at all, and that was not Xiaoyu, so why should he feel sorry for him?
Pushing forward without hesitation and hit hard, the boy made an exaggerated cry under him. He turned a deaf ear to him, only desire, no love, that would be no betrayal
For some reason, I can't continue to do it when I think of you outside the door
Whose words are still echoing in my ears?
You have to remember that we have a future and will definitely!
Whose promise disappeared in the wind?
The fresh body soothed the restlessness in his heart. However, after a brief carnival, there was a deeper emptiness and desolation that penetrated into his bones. He lay on his back sweating profusely on the bed, watching the setting sun move through the window inch by inch.
Time passes, never stops, but he still stubbornly stays in place, from the past to the present to the future
Look at you so gentle, I didn't expect that you were so powerful that I couldn't get up even if I did... The boy next to me gasped
Qingxiao seemed to have not heard of it, just staring at his coat and his phone was inserted into his pocket, but it never sounded
Yu, how is he?
At such a dusk, the sunset is so red, will he be afraid?
Why haven’t I called yet? Have I overcome my inner fear or feel that I am not enough for him to rely on?
At this moment, regret suddenly drowns Qingxiao like a tide. Why is he here? Shouldn't he stay in the house with Xiaoyu? Didn't he promise to lead that man through hell and reach heaven?
However……
However……
The oath is like iron, the will of heaven is like furnace
I thought I was strong enough, but now I really realized that no matter how well prepared I made, reality can always make him at a loss.
In the face of a cold fate, no one can claim to be a strong man
He closed his eyes and felt that the road of nothingness would continue to extend. How far could the little tenderness and love at the end support him?
At this moment, his phone rang and he was slightly shocked: It's Xiaoyu! His heart was in a mess for a moment, and he didn't know how to deal with it.
The boy next to him said in surprise: Your phone rang, why didn’t you answer?
Qingxiao frowned and said: When I answer the phone, don't talk.
The boy smiled sly, nodded, and made an OK gesture
Kiyoko's palms were sweating a little. He pressed the call button and was about to speak, but he obeyed the microphone with a passionate voice: Ah, is Kiyoko Sanada? Congratulations, welcome to join our company...
He was stunned and did not realize until the other party made a big fuss and said something. It turned out that the man was the male glasses manager of the company he interviewed not long ago.
To be honest, it was not a very satisfactory job, but being rejected was still very hurting. After receiving this call, Qingxiao felt refreshed. Many male supervisors with glasses changed their attitude this time, which was completely different from their previous coldness and reserve. They asked about his career plan, hobbies, etc. with great affection and concern. The two sides had a good conversation and agreed to go to work on Monday.
Qingxiao put down his cell phone and breathed a long breath. He was a little nervous in his excitement. Three years have passed. He was finally able to return to his original major and be accepted by society again. This should be a good sign, indicating that everything will gradually improve. He has been facing Yu every day. It is not that he is not depressed. Sometimes he suspects that he is mentally abnormal. He should return to a normal society and recognize what is the real life and the correct coordinates.
Now he shoulders the responsibility of both of them. If he can't grasp it well, who will save Yu? After all, he is the only one now.
When he thought of Yu, he couldn't help but frown again. The man was still very autistic, but his nerves were delicate and sensitive. If he had noticed what happened today, he would be afraid that there would be another storm. He smiled bitterly, rubbed his face hard, sobered himself a little bit, and turned to the boy and said: Where is the bathroom? I want to take a shower.
********************
For some reason, I can't continue to do it when I think of you outside the door
He shook his hair, and the water droplets splashed, but he couldn't take away the sound that was lingering in his ears.
The water flows rapidly from the shower, like the time that never looks back
But there is another thing that I forgot to tell you, a very important thing...
That's it, I haven't told you that I love you
He closed his eyes, he did nothing wrong, he was a man, he also needed to vent, right? Only desire and no love, that would not betrayal
But I still want to tell you that this may be the last thing I could say before I lost my sense of self. I love you, no matter whether you love me or not, no matter how things will develop...
Is it love? Is it really love? That person himself admits that his feelings for him are more grateful than love
He has done a lot, he shouldn't be too harsh on himself
He has the right to be tired
So he did nothing wrong
No
Really no
But why are you still uneasy? Your heart ached faintly as if it was scorching by a small fire? He sat down dejectedly in the bathtub, and his eyes appeared in front of him as if the man was taking a bath. His pale face was as sad as snow, and his shame and anger were in pain: Sorry, Qingxiao...I think I am so dirty!
The man said sorry to him...
Because the body has been possessed by others, although it is forced, although...
Even though that man was not at all wrong
So who is wrong?
Qingxiao punched the wall angrily, then realized that the action was meaningless, he reached out to receive the water, and the water flowed down from his fingers and hit his naked instep.
Can you wash away all traces by taking a shower? Can you act like nothing has happened?
That man apologized to him because he had been raped
And he is now taking the initiative to seek pleasure, is he...
Do you also owe that person a sorry word?
Of course, Qingxiao was not so stupid that he took the initiative to confess for peace of mind. Sometimes sincere and cruel confession hurts people more than lies. He carefully cleaned it up to make sure that he even had his hair dry. When he drove back, it was completely dark. When he saw the time, it was almost nine o'clock.
Usually, Yu should have already slept at this time, but what will happen today? Will he curl up on the sofa with his knees held by himself, waiting for himself to come back stupidly?
The closer you are to home, the more guilty Qingxiao is, what is timid and timid? He finally understood it
When he was young and frivolous, he was a regular visitor in the red light district. He never thought that there was any problem with prostitution. Why did he feel completely different if he had a personal feeling at home?
He parked the car with trepidation, and was surprised when he walked to the door. The window was dark and there was no light coming out.
A strange uneasiness came to my mind. Did something happen?
He quickly opened the door, broke into the living room, did not turn on the light, and no one was there
Xiaoyu... He moaned in a low voice, rushed over three steps and opened the bedroom door
I saw the window half open, and the outdoor lights were projecting into the half-light and half-dark room. There was a figure lying on the bed with his back facing him.
He swallowed, turned on the light, and immediately breathed a long sigh of relief. It was Xiaoyu, yes
Actually, I'm sleeping
The heart that was in his throat finally felt relieved. Qingxiao sighed and walked slowly over when he was away. Xiaoyu was still able to eat and sleep on time as if nothing had happened. He should be happy, but for some reason, he felt a little lost in his heart. Maybe in his subconscious, he was still looking forward to a lamp waiting for him.
Suddenly turning on the light did not seem to disturb Yu still turned his back to him, not moving.
Qingxiao walked to the bed and saw him closing his eyes as if he was sleeping soundly. His long eyelashes drooped down like a small fan. But Qingxiao could tell at a glance that he was not asleep, and his muscles were tight.
Qingxiao smiled and started changing clothes: Haven’t you fallen asleep yet? When I first came back, I was shocked. The window was dark and I thought something was wrong. Why didn’t you call my phone?
Because I have nothing to look for you
There was something unusual in the voice that made Qingxiao turn around and sit up, staring straight into his eyes, with a very serious expression: When you leave, I have to take care of myself and not cause trouble for you.
Qingxiao stood for two seconds, and the guilty feeling was like a little bug climbing up in his heart and biting him hard. He tried hard to search for the words, but he had to dry it: Yes...you, you did a good job.
Yu kept staring at him nervously. Fang breathed a sigh of relief, and a smile appeared on his lips: That's good I originally thought, should you be happier when you read the newspaper in the living room...
Qingxiao just wished he could slap himself twice. He quickly changed his pajamas and went to bed, and said softly: No matter how you choose, I will be happy. You are very good, you have always done a good job.
Yu was silent for a moment and whispered: I know you just encourage me, but I remember everything you said with all my heart.
Qingxiao smiled and rubbed his hair: I mean it's really good, don't think too much, go to bed quickly. After saying that, he gently printed a kiss on his forehead, his lips were soft and warm, with an apology that could not be expressed and cherished that the past was gone. I hope everything could be restored.
Yu suddenly opened his eyes wide, and his long eyelashes trembled. He snuggled up to him gently, allowing Qingxiao to cover him with a quilt and light shone on his exposed shoulders. He was so thin that he felt like he was forced to mature and lacked thickness. He leaned beside Qingxiao, closing his eyes, as if he was sleeping, and as if listening to Qingxiao's heartbeat.
After a while, he said softly: Qingxiao
Um
Your hair smells so good
Qingxiao's heart thumped, and immediately realized that it was the smell of shampoo. He quickly turned countless thoughts in his heart, and finally smiled faintly as if nothing had happened: Is that right?
Yu didn't say anything, but just stared at him quietly, his eyes like a river in the dark night, dark and quiet
That gaze made Qingxiao urge to escape in panic. He almost didn't dare to look at those eyes, and said with a tough bullet: It's already very late, go to bed quickly
He got up and turned off the lights, so that the night could hide all the panic
********************
Well, I stared at me all morning, and I just replied two times. Sadly, I left me more messages and love me more, otherwise I would be under a lot of pressure and I would fill the hole.
Almost as soon as he went out, he felt regretful. Then he did not turn around, but instead accelerated his pace. He stepped on the accelerator and stepped on the end of his heart. He felt like an evil fire was burning in his heart. Seeing the car overtaking, he took the lead, his long hair fluttered in the wind, and the anger that had been depressed for several days poured out at this moment.
He likes to drive fast trains, just like he likes sex speed and power, the wildness of life and the temptation of death, he has been able to experience the perfect sense of conquest brought by the speed of the car, which is the best satisfying man's vanity. Listen to the engine roaring, feel the wind whistling by the ears, and the scenery flashing by the road is like a condensed life. He wants to surpass, want to break through, and want to drive fast train to recover those passing time.
However, after all, there is no time limit, there are red lights and traffic jams. There are traffic rules here to be followed, and there are objective laws there. It is helpless that even though the sky is high and the earth is vast, there are countless tangible and invisible shackles and ropes between the world, which are bound to move between free will and the theorem of the world. Who can move calmly and freely?
The speed of the car had to slow down, and then the tall body curled up in the narrow carriage, and people breathed in dust and exhaust gas, and they existed
Yes, not life, just existence
No dreams, no hope, no family, no career
He didn't know how long this state would last, maybe three years, maybe thirty years, maybe a lifetime
Yu's road to recovery seems to be longer than saving his lover from the tiger's den, and he sees less hope.
He trembled for this
Is this the love he has fought for? The man in the room was covered with feathered skin. Well, even if some places have feathered qualities, he never has feathered souls at all costs, and he endured all the hardships in order to spend his whole life guarding such a stranger, and then look for the shadow of his past lover in that person every day?
But if he gives up now, why is he doing so much?
The time that cannot be recovered, the past that cannot be recovered may have been destined. Just at that bloody dusk, when he left Yu on the stage and was ruined by animals, perhaps earlier, when he saw the junior brother who was melancholy and straight on his back at Harvard campus...
Is it fate or disaster that he meets him?
Is it responsibility or love that he guards him?
I can't tell whether I am resentful or angry, so when he brought a male prostitute to bed, he had no sympathy at all, and that was not Xiaoyu, so why should he feel sorry for him?
Pushing forward without hesitation and hit hard, the boy made an exaggerated cry under him. He turned a deaf ear to him, only desire, no love, that would be no betrayal
For some reason, I can't continue to do it when I think of you outside the door
Whose words are still echoing in my ears?
You have to remember that we have a future and will definitely!
Whose promise disappeared in the wind?
The fresh body soothed the restlessness in his heart. However, after a brief carnival, there was a deeper emptiness and desolation that penetrated into his bones. He lay on his back sweating profusely on the bed, watching the setting sun move through the window inch by inch.
Time passes, never stops, but he still stubbornly stays in place, from the past to the present to the future
Look at you so gentle, I didn't expect that you were so powerful that I couldn't get up even if I did... The boy next to me gasped
Qingxiao seemed to have not heard of it, just staring at his coat and his phone was inserted into his pocket, but it never sounded
Yu, how is he?
At such a dusk, the sunset is so red, will he be afraid?
Why haven’t I called yet? Have I overcome my inner fear or feel that I am not enough for him to rely on?
At this moment, regret suddenly drowns Qingxiao like a tide. Why is he here? Shouldn't he stay in the house with Xiaoyu? Didn't he promise to lead that man through hell and reach heaven?
However……
However……
The oath is like iron, the will of heaven is like furnace
I thought I was strong enough, but now I really realized that no matter how well prepared I made, reality can always make him at a loss.
In the face of a cold fate, no one can claim to be a strong man
He closed his eyes and felt that the road of nothingness would continue to extend. How far could the little tenderness and love at the end support him?
At this moment, his phone rang and he was slightly shocked: It's Xiaoyu! His heart was in a mess for a moment, and he didn't know how to deal with it.
The boy next to him said in surprise: Your phone rang, why didn’t you answer?
Qingxiao frowned and said: When I answer the phone, don't talk.
The boy smiled sly, nodded, and made an OK gesture
Kiyoko's palms were sweating a little. He pressed the call button and was about to speak, but he obeyed the microphone with a passionate voice: Ah, is Kiyoko Sanada? Congratulations, welcome to join our company...
He was stunned and did not realize until the other party made a big fuss and said something. It turned out that the man was the male glasses manager of the company he interviewed not long ago.
To be honest, it was not a very satisfactory job, but being rejected was still very hurting. After receiving this call, Qingxiao felt refreshed. Many male supervisors with glasses changed their attitude this time, which was completely different from their previous coldness and reserve. They asked about his career plan, hobbies, etc. with great affection and concern. The two sides had a good conversation and agreed to go to work on Monday.
Qingxiao put down his cell phone and breathed a long breath. He was a little nervous in his excitement. Three years have passed. He was finally able to return to his original major and be accepted by society again. This should be a good sign, indicating that everything will gradually improve. He has been facing Yu every day. It is not that he is not depressed. Sometimes he suspects that he is mentally abnormal. He should return to a normal society and recognize what is the real life and the correct coordinates.
Now he shoulders the responsibility of both of them. If he can't grasp it well, who will save Yu? After all, he is the only one now.
When he thought of Yu, he couldn't help but frown again. The man was still very autistic, but his nerves were delicate and sensitive. If he had noticed what happened today, he would be afraid that there would be another storm. He smiled bitterly, rubbed his face hard, sobered himself a little bit, and turned to the boy and said: Where is the bathroom? I want to take a shower.
********************
For some reason, I can't continue to do it when I think of you outside the door
He shook his hair, and the water droplets splashed, but he couldn't take away the sound that was lingering in his ears.
The water flows rapidly from the shower, like the time that never looks back
But there is another thing that I forgot to tell you, a very important thing...
That's it, I haven't told you that I love you
He closed his eyes, he did nothing wrong, he was a man, he also needed to vent, right? Only desire and no love, that would not betrayal
But I still want to tell you that this may be the last thing I could say before I lost my sense of self. I love you, no matter whether you love me or not, no matter how things will develop...
Is it love? Is it really love? That person himself admits that his feelings for him are more grateful than love
He has done a lot, he shouldn't be too harsh on himself
He has the right to be tired
So he did nothing wrong
No
Really no
But why are you still uneasy? Your heart ached faintly as if it was scorching by a small fire? He sat down dejectedly in the bathtub, and his eyes appeared in front of him as if the man was taking a bath. His pale face was as sad as snow, and his shame and anger were in pain: Sorry, Qingxiao...I think I am so dirty!
The man said sorry to him...
Because the body has been possessed by others, although it is forced, although...
Even though that man was not at all wrong
So who is wrong?
Qingxiao punched the wall angrily, then realized that the action was meaningless, he reached out to receive the water, and the water flowed down from his fingers and hit his naked instep.
Can you wash away all traces by taking a shower? Can you act like nothing has happened?
That man apologized to him because he had been raped
And he is now taking the initiative to seek pleasure, is he...
Do you also owe that person a sorry word?
Of course, Qingxiao was not so stupid that he took the initiative to confess for peace of mind. Sometimes sincere and cruel confession hurts people more than lies. He carefully cleaned it up to make sure that he even had his hair dry. When he drove back, it was completely dark. When he saw the time, it was almost nine o'clock.
Usually, Yu should have already slept at this time, but what will happen today? Will he curl up on the sofa with his knees held by himself, waiting for himself to come back stupidly?
The closer you are to home, the more guilty Qingxiao is, what is timid and timid? He finally understood it
When he was young and frivolous, he was a regular visitor in the red light district. He never thought that there was any problem with prostitution. Why did he feel completely different if he had a personal feeling at home?
He parked the car with trepidation, and was surprised when he walked to the door. The window was dark and there was no light coming out.
A strange uneasiness came to my mind. Did something happen?
He quickly opened the door, broke into the living room, did not turn on the light, and no one was there
Xiaoyu... He moaned in a low voice, rushed over three steps and opened the bedroom door
I saw the window half open, and the outdoor lights were projecting into the half-light and half-dark room. There was a figure lying on the bed with his back facing him.
He swallowed, turned on the light, and immediately breathed a long sigh of relief. It was Xiaoyu, yes
Actually, I'm sleeping
The heart that was in his throat finally felt relieved. Qingxiao sighed and walked slowly over when he was away. Xiaoyu was still able to eat and sleep on time as if nothing had happened. He should be happy, but for some reason, he felt a little lost in his heart. Maybe in his subconscious, he was still looking forward to a lamp waiting for him.
Suddenly turning on the light did not seem to disturb Yu still turned his back to him, not moving.
Qingxiao walked to the bed and saw him closing his eyes as if he was sleeping soundly. His long eyelashes drooped down like a small fan. But Qingxiao could tell at a glance that he was not asleep, and his muscles were tight.
Qingxiao smiled and started changing clothes: Haven’t you fallen asleep yet? When I first came back, I was shocked. The window was dark and I thought something was wrong. Why didn’t you call my phone?
Because I have nothing to look for you
There was something unusual in the voice that made Qingxiao turn around and sit up, staring straight into his eyes, with a very serious expression: When you leave, I have to take care of myself and not cause trouble for you.
Qingxiao stood for two seconds, and the guilty feeling was like a little bug climbing up in his heart and biting him hard. He tried hard to search for the words, but he had to dry it: Yes...you, you did a good job.
Yu kept staring at him nervously. Fang breathed a sigh of relief, and a smile appeared on his lips: That's good I originally thought, should you be happier when you read the newspaper in the living room...
Qingxiao just wished he could slap himself twice. He quickly changed his pajamas and went to bed, and said softly: No matter how you choose, I will be happy. You are very good, you have always done a good job.
Yu was silent for a moment and whispered: I know you just encourage me, but I remember everything you said with all my heart.
Qingxiao smiled and rubbed his hair: I mean it's really good, don't think too much, go to bed quickly. After saying that, he gently printed a kiss on his forehead, his lips were soft and warm, with an apology that could not be expressed and cherished that the past was gone. I hope everything could be restored.
Yu suddenly opened his eyes wide, and his long eyelashes trembled. He snuggled up to him gently, allowing Qingxiao to cover him with a quilt and light shone on his exposed shoulders. He was so thin that he felt like he was forced to mature and lacked thickness. He leaned beside Qingxiao, closing his eyes, as if he was sleeping, and as if listening to Qingxiao's heartbeat.
After a while, he said softly: Qingxiao
Um
Your hair smells so good
Qingxiao's heart thumped, and immediately realized that it was the smell of shampoo. He quickly turned countless thoughts in his heart, and finally smiled faintly as if nothing had happened: Is that right?
Yu didn't say anything, but just stared at him quietly, his eyes like a river in the dark night, dark and quiet
That gaze made Qingxiao urge to escape in panic. He almost didn't dare to look at those eyes, and said with a tough bullet: It's already very late, go to bed quickly
He got up and turned off the lights, so that the night could hide all the panic
********************
Well, I stared at me all morning, and I just replied two times. Sadly, I left me more messages and love me more, otherwise I would be under a lot of pressure and I would fill the hole.
![[Incestuous Novels] The young lady who was being played with - SM, training, props, loli, school beauties, stockings, depravity, NTR](/templates/nvshen/themes/img/thumb_1.png)