Chapter 78

If I could shirk the blame to the idiot for the first time, but the second time, I was completely responsible for it. After that, I fell into a state of extreme depression and felt that I might be sinking into the abyss of depravity.

I have known for a long time that from a sexual perspective, men are more or less obscene. I always feel that I am not bad. After all, I have never done anything obscene. Looking back now, I am afraid that it is because I don’t have the chance or the courage to do obscene things. Once I encounter a little temptation, the man’s nature will be exposed immediately.

But I'm really so obscene?

To the point where you use a nanny as a tool for purity?

I dare not answer this question, I refuse to admit it, because I feel that I am not so obscene yet; but I dare not deny that what just happened is there

Maybe I have excuses, and idiots are my best excuses, but it is not easy for people to have excuses?

The next day I was lying on the bed, feeling depressed and didn't let the nanny come in. Although the nanny wanted to come in, I saw that both nanny wanted to come in, so I locked myself in the room to reflect on myself.

Sister Wan knocked on me once, but I didn't let me in. The swimming pool was about to be closed. Today is the last day. Sister Wan came to ask me to go to the swimming pool. Sister Wan didn't like swimming very much, but she still wanted to go the last time, but I said I was uncomfortable and didn't go, and I agreed to open the door.

Sister Wan was very angry, but I didn't want to see Sister Wan. I felt very ashamed, especially when I saw Sister Wan and Ai Mei. Their purity and beauty contrasted my dirty and dirty things. Sister Wan's beauty has always been my dream, but my own behavior made me feel that I don't deserve such a dream.

At night, Yue Gu came, but I still didn't want her to come in. But Yue Gu said, I won't let her in, she just waited at the door until I opened the door.

There was no way, I had to let Aunt Yue come in, I felt a little disappointed, I actually hoped that Aunt Lin would come in

I lay on the bed with my back on the sky, not looking at Yue Gu, looking indifferent, and I was actually very painful inside.

Yue Gu came over to hold my hand and said, Get up, don’t be so depressed, Lin Gu told me, it’s no big deal, puberty is just going to pass

I sat up, I knew that Yue Gu was interested in the fingerprints on my face, and Lin Gu didn't know. Yesterday, Lin Gu didn't have time to ask for details, so she was scared away. Today I thought about it myself, I should tell Lin Gu the details and see her reaction. Unfortunately, she didn't come. I think she was still afraid to face me. I know in my heart that this is a good thing.

Now that the aunt of Yue is here, I think I'd better tell her, and it should be transmitted to the aunt of Lin. I said, "What's the big deal?" I almost raped a teacher!

Yue Gu was shocked, raped teacher! Who are you referring to? - Teacher Yu! Oh my God, you dare to touch her?

I replied gloomyly, it's not her, her friend

What's going on? What's going on?

I sighed and said, Yue Gu, you have always guessed that I am not an idiot, but another person. I am also guessing now that I am really another person, but an idiot is also in my body. Sometimes I think he is working. Of course, I am not trying to defend my behavior, but I can't explain it afterwards

I think the half-true statement is the only way to do it

Oh? Then what was the situation at that time? Tell me to Yue Gu

I pretended to recall and said, Teacher Yu’s friend is a sculptor. Yesterday, Teacher Yu was uncomfortable and went into the inner room to rest for a while. Teacher Tong, her surname was Tong, said she wanted to make a statue for me and asked me if I would be her model. I agreed, and she started to touch my face and body. As I touched my body, I felt as uncomfortable as if it was on fire. My mind was blank. I also touched her breasts and pulled her pants. She screamed. Teacher Yu came out and slapped me. I seemed to wake up. Teacher Yu said I was a hooligan and wanted to rape the teacher!

She actually touched your body? Why did she touch your body? Did she touch you below?

I said, I don't know, -- it seems that there is no

Yue Gu said, but the fool of Pity is all caused by CuteCute. It wakes you up, but you run away.

I did such an extraordinary thing, and she was not the first to blame me?

But I don't want to splash dirty water on Sister Cute

I shook my head and said, "It's not my fault for Sister Cute. Actually, after I woke up, I started to feel uncomfortable. Maybe I was uncomfortable before, but I just couldn't say it...

Yue Gu interrupted me and said firmly, "You didn't have one before, I know."

Well, even if I haven’t before, after waking up, I have eaten your milk, Lin Gu’s milk, and Sister Wan’s milk. Every time I feel as uncomfortable as if I’m burning, I just don’t dare to violate you, I’m afraid of you, but that Teacher Tong, alas! It’s so embarrassing!

Yue Gu actually smiled and said, Chi'er, does that Teacher Tong have big breasts?

Yue Gu! I feel very uncomfortable, you still laugh at me

Actually, I knew it in my heart that I told the matter of Teacher Tong to the Lord Yue and Lin, and they would forgive me. After all, Teacher Tong touched me first.

But I definitely dare not say anything about the nanny, especially the second time, when Yue Gu, Lin Gu, or other people in the family know, they will undoubtedly despise me and hate me. Then, as the patriarch or as the nephew, I will be abandoned by others.

Sure enough, Yue Gu said, "You crazy, you don't have to blame yourself too much." The teacher is also brainless. Can a boy's body be touched at will?

I shook my head and said, "Mr. Yue, don't comfort me, I know I'm very bad now." I thought of the nanny.

Yue Gu is very happy to be able to demand this way. I believe that Chi'er will not become bad-of course, you also have to learn to restrain yourself

Yue Gu said something hesitantly, without any decisiveness

I think the Wan family men have always been romantic and lustful. Since there were women, they have never stopped women. That is to say, when they are ignorant, the Wan family men don’t know how to restrain themselves. I think Yue Gu should be clear about the history of the Wan family men. Now, it is really difficult for me to ask for an idiot (I guess Yue Gu still thinks of me in this matter).

Thinking of restraint, thinking of the idiot who refuses to restrain, I can't help but sigh

Yue Gu said, "But Pity's fool!" As he said that, he wanted to hug me, but I struggled out and said, "Don't want to get close to Yue Gu's chest."

Yue Gu smiled and said, "Are you afraid of Yue Gu? You are not afraid of it, what are you afraid of?"--By the way, Lin Gu told me, she asked you to help you, do you understand what Lin Gu means?"

Yue Gu was straightforward, not as shy as Lin Gu

I hesitated for a moment and said, I think I understand, I found it online, but I don’t want it. The Internet age is so good. No matter what you want to make up, even if you push it on the Internet, Bailing is not happy.

Why?

Don't want to, don't

Yue Gu looked at me, sighed, and said, Jia Baoyu is happier than you, he has a maid Ah

I felt happy, I thought, this means that Yue Gu has recognized whether I can have love or not. I thought to myself, I don’t have a maid, I have a nanny, Ah

But I was shocked by my own thoughts. Have I accepted using nanny as a sexual tool?

In order to divert this terrible idea, I said, Yue Gu, are you talking about "Dream of Red Mansions" again?

Is it Ah, you should try to read more books, which can divert your attention

OK I promised Yue Gu, I think this might be a good idea

After Yue Gu left, she remembered what I thought just now, and felt that sexual desire was in her heart again. I didn’t want to think about the nanny’s problem, nor did I want to stay alone in the room. I was afraid that something would happen again, so I went to the garden for a walk alone.

This is the first time I went to the garden for a walk alone at night. There are lights in the bushes in the garden, but they are not bright, but lights with light white lights, which look dark and quiet, and gloomy. It depends on whether you are afraid of the dark night or not.

I was not afraid in my previous life, but now I am a little nervous

I encouraged myself and walked deep into the garden. A person suddenly turned from behind the tree. I knew it was a person, but I was still shocked. Who? I asked.

Are you crazy brother? Why are you so nervous?

I heard the sound of Sister Fei. When I got closer, it was her. I was overjoyed and walked over to hold Sister Fei's hand. I didn't know why I went to Sister Lafei's hand naturally and said happily, Sister Fei, it's you, I'm so happy to meet you!

Perhaps my words revealed true feelings, but Sister Fei didn't shake my hand away, just said, "It's so late, why are you here?"

Can't sleep, come out for a walk

Can't sleep? Will you still not sleep? Do you have any thoughts that can't be let go?

Sister Fei's words were obviously ridiculed, so I asked back, Sister Fei often goes out for a walk at night, right?--It turns out that Sister Fei has the thought that she can't let go.

Very Ah, I have only been to school for a few days and have learned so cunningly that I dare to make fun of Sister Fei!--I don’t know how to bully people in the future?

I think Sister Fei looks more lively today than usual. I don’t know if it’s because she is in the dark.

No matter what, I don’t dare to bully Sister Fei, Sister Fei is my teacher Ah!

My heart was thumping. If Sister Fei knew that I almost raped the teacher yesterday, she would have thought that I was teasing her.

You still have a conscience, then, the teacher asks you, what books have you read recently? Are you lazy?

No, I am reading "War and Peace". I blurted out, and Sister Fei was surprised. "War and Peace"? How could you read this book?

I searched the world famous books online, and saw this book and said it was very good. I read it. It was a bit difficult, but I must finish reading it.

So where are you reading now?

I thought for a while, thinking about where to read to have the most interesting communication with Sister Fei? I said, I read that someone went to the countryside to propose to Maria, but teased the French lady.

I know that Sister Fei certainly won’t suspect that I am interested in finding such chapters. I was just trying to talk about this with Sister Fei, but I didn’t expect Sister Fei to say, Sister Fei really wants to ask you about your feelings, but today is too late, I will go to school tomorrow. Forget it, you go back and think about it carefully. We will go out for a walk together in a few days and listen to your thoughts

Although I was a little disappointed, Sister Fei asked me for a walk! I was still very happy. OK, Sister Fei-Don't forget!

Back in the room, I felt a little more peaceful, no longer the Qi Nian who wanted to have sex. Of course, the idiot was satisfied, I was regretting it. Lin Gu Yue Gu advised me, and offended Sister Wan for this, and just talked with Sister Fei. I have any vulgar ideas, then I am really a complete bastard.

Before going to bed, I thought, maybe I should have read the books I read in my previous life again, which may be able to enhance the soul of an idiot. If I want to truly achieve the unity of the soul and flesh, if I descend to the level of an idiot, it will undoubtedly be a depravity.

Then you can only get the idiot to rise up, and reading again may be a feasible way.