Little river, I am willing to stay by your side and listen to your singing. The eternal singing makes me look for the past in my memories, the little girl wearing butterflies...
The melodious and passionate singing is getting lighter and lighter in my ears, as if it is quietly moving away
I took off my headphones and said to the clerk: I need this set of headphone cables to sterling silver manual cables
The total was 11,680 yuan. The clerk's face seemed to have a flower blooming, and his facial features were crowded together: Are you paying cash or swiping a card?
I took out one of the two bulging envelopes from my pocket, opened it, and took out a stack of RMB contained inside.
After a while, I left the music fever equipment store with a brick-like music player and a headphone that had just changed into a headphone cable.
The pocket is a little lighter, but it is still a long way to go to spend all this money
I live alone, have no hobbies, and no need for big spending
In this era, as a criminal policeman, my salary is good, and I have almost nowhere to spend anything except repaying the mortgage.
Just save your salary
But I always dislike the money enclosed by these two envelopes in my pocket. I always want to spend it quickly. It is a waste of time to see it.
After the anti-pornography ended last night, I took the envelope home and saw another envelope I got not long ago.
It was an old classmate from a police academy. I asked me to introduce my colleague from the household registration office to him. When I asked him to say a few words, I would give me tea anyway.
I took it back and threw it there. I didn't even look at it for almost a month.
But after getting another envelope back last night, I decided to take advantage of the holiday today to eliminate them
I'm working on eliminating them now, but it's not easy
After buying this set of music-firing equipment, the combined money in the two envelopes was only one-fifth less.
Although I occasionally listen to music, I have no research on this thing
When the clerk introduced the 6,000-yuan player and 5,000-yuan earbuds, what sound field, analysis, dive... I can't understand a word
Just using them to listen to the old songs I like, I bought them
But there are so many more to solve?
Donate?
No no no no
When I first started receiving this kind of envelope, I felt more hot than I am now, and I couldn't keep it for a moment. I almost donated it to the Red Cross and Hope Project immediately.
But later I personally caught a guy from the Red Cross who embezzled a large amount of social donations and escaped after the incident, and I vowed that I would never do such a stupid thing again
I casually carried the things I just bought and wandered around the street.
The city is on its lanterns again, but I don't know what to do
After shaking for half a street, I finally bought another women's necklace and a watch for myself, which was almost done to eliminate the money.
Most men don't like shopping, so do I
I just felt that shopping was more tiring than chasing the fugitive. I was about to sit and rest and saw a bar, so I quickly got in.
This is a fan bar, I used to come and have a drink occasionally and check the ball
When I walked into the bar, there were already many fans wearing football uniforms gathered here, divided into two camps, quarreling loudly over a game that had not started yet.
...After all, you can afford to be a ball and jade.
Yes, yes, you are the real ball king. The World Cup qualifiers are only two fewer goals than the violent birds who played football in the Chinese Super League.
The smell of gunpowder and male hormones are emitted in the air
Fans from both camps are very aggressive, but I know nothing big will happen
They are fans of Real Madrid and Barcelona, and they are mortal enemies. They will quarrel almost as soon as they meet, and even occasionally attack, but they will not really cause any serious consequences.
I am on vacation now, just pretending that I have seen nothing, slowly sip a glass of wine, waiting for the upcoming game to begin
But then, I heard a voice that made me feel very disharmonious and unpleasant: ...Pugou blows the sky, there is no fertilizer in the Champions League yet, hahaha, look at your lineup, it is as old as fertilizer.
You guys are so embarrassed to talk about AC Milan...
When I heard the word fertilizer, Wuming immediately became angry. He held the wine glass heavily on the bar and walked towards the tall and strong young man who was laughing proudly with the first word.
Some people immediately realized that there was a chance to watch and started whistling
I ignored others and walked straight to the guy, patted the round table in front of him, stared at him and asked: Who do you think is the fertilizer?
That guy looked at me in casual clothes and laughed: Oh, there are Milan fans Ah these days, you are all fat...
If you can do it, don't force it
Before he finished speaking, I did it
This guy is bigger than me, and I can tell that he has excellent physical strength and other aspects for a long time.
It's a pity that I'm a criminal policeman, a professional
So after two crackling sounds, I pressed him to the ground, pressed his knee against the back of his neck, cut his right arm back, and said angrily: Who do you think is the fertilizer?
I fuck me fuck that guy couldn't move, he was still scolding
Several young people nearby seemed to be his friends, stood up and walked towards us, one of them lifted a stool
I just sneered, took out my hand and shouted: I now suspect that this guy is engaged in drug trafficking, and irrelevant people, don't interfere with my official duties, otherwise it will be a police officer
Everyone present was shocked. For a moment, the guys all stopped, while the others began to retreat involuntarily.
Oh! The owner of the bar finally appeared. After a look, he was sweating profusely: Team Yang, what's going on? I'm just a fan bar, not that kind of nightclub. How could there be drugs? Is there any misunderstanding? Then he looked at the guy under me and sighed: You guy is in trouble. This is Captain Yang of the branch criminal police team. Do you know the bank robbery two days before the serious case? He arrested the robber...
Of course I know there will be no drug circulation here
This bar is actually very healthy, unlike the kind of place that hides dirt and dirt
These young people are just over-energy and have a little bad temper
But it is not the first time I've threatened others so much. Although I didn't really plan to frame this guy, I sneered: Yes, just go to the bureau with me, don't worry. We will notify your family and unit in writing if it won't take more than 48 hours.
This guy was still calling me to complain to you or something, but after hearing my last sentence, he finally became depressed
Notifying his family and unit that he was taken away by the police to investigate the drug case. Even if he was completely innocent, he would not be able to avoid being suspicious and contempt in the future.
I'm really bad
Police, police officer... The young man who was arrogant just now finally lowered his head and his face looked like earth: I have never been exposed to drugs, you know... Yes... Sorry...
I looked at him coldly: Huh?
Then he realized: Sorry, sorry, I am a fertilizer... Ah, I am a yellow dog, a yellow dog...
I let go of my hand, stood up, ignored him, passed through the silent bar with fear, contempt, anger... eyes, returned to the bar, picked up my half glass of wine and drank it all, then took two bills, picked up my things, and left with me
The autumn night wind blows on my cheeks, calming me a little
I know that my behavior is very slutty, I slander others' innocence out of nothing, and bully others by virtue of my power
Although the young man bowed his head and begged for mercy, I was not happy at all
When did I become like this? Why did I become like this?
I sat down on the steps of a cinema on the roadside, lit a cigarette, and spit out a cloud of smoke towards the night sky without stars and only neon lights.
Now I'm really a bad person
Accept bribes, squander the power, squander the money, use public service to private affairs, and be domineering... If Xin'er sees such a brother, she will definitely be disappointed
*********
Ouch, this dead girl is so unlucky... Grandma raised the broom with difficulty and beat her sister with no brains
The thirteen-year-old Xin'er still held her head like she did when she was a child. She was no longer like a reed stalk but a peeled wild rice. Blue and red quickly appeared on her white and smooth arms, but she did not cry, but defended stubbornly: Grandma, don't hit me, I didn't mean it, I didn't know... bleeding
Unlike before, this time, in addition to grievances, Xin'er's face also had two blushings, crisp and gentle, and there was no more tender voice left, and there was also a touch of indescribable shyness.
When I just returned home from junior high school in the town after school, I saw this scene and rushed over and asked: Grandma, what's wrong? Why are you doing?
In fact, grandma rarely hits her sister
She is too old, and her sister has quietly shown herself to be taller than her
She slapped a few times, then stopped her hand with difficulty, turned to an old bed sheet on the ground, and shouted angrily: Binzi, look, this damn girl, making the bed... it's really bad.
Only then did I notice that on the old faded sheet in my heart, there were a large and small patches of blood stained with red blood.
I was startled and shouted in fear: Ha? What's going on? Xin'er has shed so much blood, why are you still hitting her? I rushed towards Xin'er and looked at her anxiously: Why are you making so much blood? What's wrong? Or is it injured? After saying that, he grabbed her soft little hand: I'll take you to the town health center!
Unexpectedly, Xin'er broke free from my hand, lowered her head, and whispered: Brother, brother, don't go to the hospital... Then she said to her grandma: I'll wash myself...
But grandma shouted angrily: Why are you so dirty? You are still at home? Are you not afraid of causing trouble for your brother? You are about to lose it! Unfortunately, this bed sheet... After saying that, she raised the broom in her hand again tremblingly
Xin'er shrank her fair neck and stepped forward to pick up the bed sheet
I looked at the sheet that was half of the area covered by patches, which was older than Xin'er, and even bigger than me, blocked in front of my grandma, and said angrily: This sheet is so broken, and it should be thrown away if it is not dirty. Then buy one for Xin'er.
Grandma shouted angrily: Where did you get the money, Ah?
I already know that although our family is poor, it is not so poor
I was also a little angry: Xin'er has been this old bed sheet until now... It's almost ten years old! It's all broken... She has always used it herself to use it now and buy her a bed sheet... If you don't buy it, I'll give her my new bed sheet.
Grandma can't do anything to me
The older you are, the more so
Seeing that I was angry, I had to put down my broom: OK, okay, little ancestor, can't I buy it?
I am still worried that Xin'er's body is so big that it really shocks me.
I was about to ask again, but Xin'er didn't do the same as before. Every time I spoke for her, I immediately thanked me happily, stuck to me, and showed my intimacy. But for the first time in my life, I rudely asked my grandma another request: I also want to buy sanitary napkins...
sanitary napkin?
I was stunned when I heard this word
At the age of fourteen or fifteen, I am still at a ignorant and curious age. In that closed and backward environment, I still have no idea about these physiological knowledge.
It was not until a moment later that I remembered the female classmates in my class. It seemed that some of them were using this kind of thing.
So... Xin'er's blood is not sick or injured, but a physiological phenomenon that all women will experience.
I opened my mouth wide in surprise, while my grandmother returned to the room angrily. After a moment, she appeared again, throwing a thick, thick piece of cloth onto the sheet in my arms, and shouted in anger: What kind of sanitary napkins should I buy! Take it!
Xin'er glanced at the thing, her face turned redder and her voice was smaller, but her attitude was even more stubborn: Grandma, everyone is using sanitary napkins now, and no one else uses her menstruation to take care of her. Sister Juanjuan and they all say that using this is not good for the health. You buy it for me.
Grandma screamed: Oh, hey, do you still think you are a precious thing? I have used this for a lifetime and I have never seen any disease! A pack of sanitary napkins is more than one yuan, so expensive your father finally found a job on the construction site in the city. The family was just a little more abundant, so you pointed to be a petite lady? I tell you, the door was not fed! You can use it if you use it, and if you don’t need it, you will pull it down... Your brother feels sorry for you and asks me to buy you bed sheets. If you get dirty, I will see that I won’t beat you to death...
My heart lowered my head, and my slender fingers caught the dirty and ugly piece of cloth like a spasm.
A shiny tears fell on the cloth and disappeared in an instant
At that time, I was in a state of short-circuiting my brain
When I realized that Xin'er had her first period and should have used some basic daily necessities, my grandmother had already returned to the inner room with cursing, while Xin'er quietly left the house.
I ran out to find her
A moment later, I saw her at the entrance of the village
She sat on a big rock, lowered her head, holding the menstrual belt in her hand, and her slender body was trembling violently.
Xin'er When I called by her side, Xin'er raised her head, her face was covered with shiny tears, and she sobbed in anger: Brother, brother, I don't want to be a petite lady
This is the second time Xin'er cried
Just like last time, it upset me
Of course I know she is not
She is not just a petite lady, her grandmother is so mean to her, and her life is not even as good as a girl.
As a teenager, I have begun to understand right and wrong, and how unfair my grandmother and I were to her before
I wanted to go back to my grandma and ask her to buy sanitary napkins for Xin'er, but I felt a little instinctively embarrassed, and a kind of instinctive aura that I was already old and should not be fooled with my grandma anymore.
So I snatched the menstrual belt in Xin'er's hand without hesitation and threw it into the grass on the roadside
Then I pulled up a slender and soft little hand: Go to town, my brother will buy it for you
Xin'er opened her tears in surprise, hesitated, and retreated a little: Brother, brother...
I pretended to be strange and asked: What's wrong, don't you want to buy it?
No, no, Xin'er shook her little head and stammered, her expression had changed from sadness to shame: That, that...no...my brother is a man...that's very expensive...
At that moment, I showed that I looked like my brother the most in my life, and smiled with my nose up: What's good? We don't have a mother... Who bought you my money? Last time the school held a sports meeting, my grandma gave me ten yuan, and there were six yuan left for me. I originally wanted to take you to the video hall in the town tomorrow to watch the video and eat together.
Xin'er's face was slightly red, she was a little uneasy, but she couldn't suppress her happiness: OK, OK...
I touched her head and smiled: Then wait here, I'll ride my bike here
Yes! Xin'er nodded vigorously
So I turned around and ran to the door
It was already the beginning of the new century, and this country began to accelerate its urbanization process
Making constructions everywhere, tall buildings are rushing to emerge on the vast land
Thanks to the blessing of the environment, my father was able to get rid of the life of short-term work
Several nearby villages organized a construction team, and my father became a migrant worker
Although there are still many problems, no matter what, my family is no longer so poor
When I arrived in junior high school in town, my father could buy me a bicycle
I was pushing the bicycle toward the entrance of the village now, but I felt a little confused in my heart
It has been two years since I started in junior high school
Because my sister is still in elementary school, I no longer go to school with her like before in the past two years, get off school and play together like before.
Even at night I have to go to self-study. When I get home on a bicycle, I often have to meet my sister, say hello and go to bed.
We have been together suddenly and I have not paid much attention to her because my horizons are gradually broadening.
It was not until just now that I suddenly discovered this fact that surprised me:
In the past two years when I didn't notice her, she had grown up secretly
How did that little thing grow up?
When did she grow up?
What will happen to her when she grows up?
Beyond my confusion, I was also a little worried.
When she grows up, will she marry someone else as her wife?
Will it be my little thing anymore?
This hateful little thing actually grew up secretly while I was not paying attention
No, she hasn't grown up yet...
She has grown up
I know
Although the teacher never attends physiological and hygiene classes, I also learned a little bit of physiological knowledge.
Girls are different from boys. Girls grow up, which is a landmark event...
When I pushed the bicycle and saw my pretty sister standing at the entrance of the village, I understood that she had really grown up
That little thing that always shrinks into a ball has become a memory
If a 10-year-old sister is like a green willow branch, the thirteen-year-old sister in front of her is completely a gently swaying willow branch
Although it is still so slender and even a little thin, its slender body has already supported the girl's pose
The part I occasionally expect seems to have nothing, but Yingying's waist has begun to outline a graceful curve.
The moving willow branches were shaking in front of me, ripples in my heart
She greeted me lightly, her black and shiny short hair fluttering gently in her ears
Neat bangs cover the smooth forehead, and the emerald eyebrows are still big and bright eyes
These eyes are now getting gentler, and a pool of green spring water flows between the black and white.
I don't know when the bridge of the nose became tall and straightened, and the light red and petal-like lips were as beautiful as ever.
Only the baby fat with her cheeks and chin was still a little chubby, told me she was still a childish child
Brother, what's on my face? Xin'er suddenly stopped and stretched out her little hand to rub her face
After I was stunned, I quickly laughed: Nothing, nothing. After a pause, I said in a complicated mood: You have grown up
A faint blush appeared on her white and tender cheeks. Xin'er looked at me embarrassedly and turned her head away
I laughed quickly: Come on, get in the car
Xin'er clumsyly sat down in the back of the bicycle, and then tightly sat on my waist
I remember I rarely take her on a bicycle
She was a little nervous and hugged me tightly. When I started pedaling, she even trembled and pressed on my back.
I was immediately distracted
The warm and moist breath passed through the warp and weft lines of the single clothes, gently scratching the small piece of skin on my back, bringing a strange itchy
And her skin is different from before, through her clothes.
Still soft and warm, but now there is a strange slippery and indescribable elasticity
What's even more terrible is that I felt that there seemed to be something on the washboard that was leaning against me.
There is indeed something more
Two small, soft balls, like two naughty little animals, slipping through the clothes, gently rubbing against me one after another, making me sweaty, rubbing my whole body stiff, and making my heart sway
Just when I was feeling uncomfortable, my heart finally spoke gently, diverting my attention: Do you brother don’t like me growing up?
I was stunned and quickly laughed: It's either Ah, I just thought that when you grow up, you will marry someone else as your wife
Xin'er's cheeks were tightly pressed against my back: I'm not married, I've been with my brother all the time
After a moment, I replied with difficulty: Good Ah
I didn't think too much at that time
In that feudal and backward environment, people around us rarely talk about things between men and women, and no one tells us what to do and what not to do
I never thought about anything. Xin'er is my sister. We can't be together all the time. Instead, I feel very happy and relieved.
Although I was a little worried, it was also fleeting
Xin'er seemed to be thinking about something, so we rarely talked about it all the way
It was not until the entrance of a larger grocery store in the town that Xin'er asked nervously again: What kind of thing should I buy?
How could I know these things
After parked the car, he felt embarrassed to enter the door. He Xin'er stood at the door and asked: Have you never asked you Sister Juanjuan and the others before.
Xin'er shook her head: I rarely see them now
There's really no way
This knowledge should have been taught by mothers or other female elders, but we only have an old and stupid grandma
, I can only rely on my brother, to discuss and study such things with her
After thinking for a while, I had no idea and had to say: Go and ask
Xin'er's cheeks were red, and she seemed to be unable to take steps
I knew she was embarrassed and smiled: Let's go and ask together. After that, I pulled her little hand and walked into the grocery store.
Fortunately, our town is very small, and almost everyone in the town has contacted each other, and the owner of this grocery store is also a warm woman I have ever met.
After a long mess of conversations such as wings, side leakage, flow, etc., we chose a pack
Xin'er immediately couldn't wait to ask the shop owner to borrow the toilet for use
After asking, the owner said with a smile: Now I'm putting toilet paper? Then go and change it if I don't call me again, I'll teach you
After Xin'er grabbed the pack of sanitary napkins, she ran into the store
The woman looked at me and was amazed: This is the first time I have seen such a young man like this with my own sister...Aren't you afraid of bad luck?
I shook my head blankly: What a bad luck... I don't understand
No adults in your family teach her? The woman suddenly seemed a little angry
I quickly explained: My mom is no longer here, my dad is working in the city
Not easy...not easy. The woman then felt relieved: It's a blessing for that girl to have a brother like you.
I waved my hand embarrassedly, and then I heard Xin'er's low call
Sure enough, it was still a bit troublesome if you used it for the first time without anyone's guidance.
So the owner went into the inner room and came out with Xin'er for a while. He smiled and said: OK, remember Ah, you have to stick it there, otherwise it will easily become a bun.
Thank you auntie, let's thank you together
Then Xin'er walked to me with a red face and shouted in a low voice: Brother
I touched her head and smiled and said: Have you changed? Then let's go back
After thanking again, we left the grocery store
And when we got home, I found something was wrong with her.
After getting off the bike, she kept covering her belly, her little face turned pale
When I asked her anxiously, she replied weakly: It hurts...
Grandma went out, but I didn't have much money, so I didn't dare to take her to the hospital again, so I could only hurriedly run to find a barefoot doctor in the village.
After he asked a few questions, he said with a smile: This is dysmenorrhea, most women feel a little uncomfortable when they first menstruate. It is normal. If you let her lie down and rest well, fry some brown sugar water for her, it hurts so much that it can't stand it. Let's go to the town health center to have a look.
I didn't understand his words very well and didn't dare to neglect them. After I got home, I quickly let Xin'er lie down on my bed, and then clumsily brewed her brown sugar water.
After drinking, my heart looked a little more comfortable, but I was worried about her situation, so I stayed by the bed with her
Brother, if you sing to me, I will fall asleep. Although Xin'er wants to sleep for a while, she can't sleep.
After a long struggle, I whispered a willful request in a low voice.
I was a little embarrassed for a moment, and I wanted to refuse in a conditioned manner
A 14 or 15-year-old boy may be difficult to do such a shameful thing
But Xin'er looked at me eagerly, her big eyes lost their luster, and her little face was also dyed with an unnatural flush between the pale, which made me unable to refuse
Finally, I turned my head embarrassedly and said stammeringly: I can't sing
Brother Xin'er reached out to grab my sleeve and pulled it weakly: If you know how to sing Ah, then I will teach you that...
I did learn that song through my interactions with my sister, and I often hum a few words.
So there was nothing to refuse, so I had to endure the burning heat on my cheeks and said stiffly: OK, then you go to bed quickly, then take a breath and swallow, and finally sang in a low voice: Brother Dog, save me quickly...
What I sing must be very ugly, right?
I know I don't sing well, and I'm often laughed at by my friends
But Xin'er doesn't think so
She quickly calmed down with my singing. Her slender body was originally tense and even curled up slightly, but now it has relaxed without realizing it.
When I sang the second time, those beautiful big eyes had closed slightly, and the long eyelashes were still hidden, looking at me with attachment, as if I was reluctant to close it, and I didn't want me to disappear from her vision
At that time, I must have been perfect in her blurry sight, right?
Tall, powerful, careful, gentle, kind, upright, patient... Protect her, take care of her, care for her, and make reasonable requests from her grandmother for justice, saving her money for her to buy things for her...
I don't know how long it took, but after she made a slight and slight breathing, I stopped singing and looked at this stable sleeping face with a smile.
It was the first time since she came to me that I had looked at her so carefully after she fell asleep
Although I was a little tired, I didn't feel impatient at all. Instead, I felt very warm in my heart. I thought I could watch it for a while
Until it was dark, I stood up and looked at the smooth and delicate cheeks that were shining in the twilight. Suddenly, I couldn't control my inexplicable impulse and leaned over and kissed her quickly on the face.
A smooth and soft touch came from the lips, which was like an electric current spreading to the whole body.
I raised my head like a thief and looked at Xin'er guiltily.
But she slept soundly and peacefully, and a beautiful smile quietly appeared on her face.
The melodious and passionate singing is getting lighter and lighter in my ears, as if it is quietly moving away
I took off my headphones and said to the clerk: I need this set of headphone cables to sterling silver manual cables
The total was 11,680 yuan. The clerk's face seemed to have a flower blooming, and his facial features were crowded together: Are you paying cash or swiping a card?
I took out one of the two bulging envelopes from my pocket, opened it, and took out a stack of RMB contained inside.
After a while, I left the music fever equipment store with a brick-like music player and a headphone that had just changed into a headphone cable.
The pocket is a little lighter, but it is still a long way to go to spend all this money
I live alone, have no hobbies, and no need for big spending
In this era, as a criminal policeman, my salary is good, and I have almost nowhere to spend anything except repaying the mortgage.
Just save your salary
But I always dislike the money enclosed by these two envelopes in my pocket. I always want to spend it quickly. It is a waste of time to see it.
After the anti-pornography ended last night, I took the envelope home and saw another envelope I got not long ago.
It was an old classmate from a police academy. I asked me to introduce my colleague from the household registration office to him. When I asked him to say a few words, I would give me tea anyway.
I took it back and threw it there. I didn't even look at it for almost a month.
But after getting another envelope back last night, I decided to take advantage of the holiday today to eliminate them
I'm working on eliminating them now, but it's not easy
After buying this set of music-firing equipment, the combined money in the two envelopes was only one-fifth less.
Although I occasionally listen to music, I have no research on this thing
When the clerk introduced the 6,000-yuan player and 5,000-yuan earbuds, what sound field, analysis, dive... I can't understand a word
Just using them to listen to the old songs I like, I bought them
But there are so many more to solve?
Donate?
No no no no
When I first started receiving this kind of envelope, I felt more hot than I am now, and I couldn't keep it for a moment. I almost donated it to the Red Cross and Hope Project immediately.
But later I personally caught a guy from the Red Cross who embezzled a large amount of social donations and escaped after the incident, and I vowed that I would never do such a stupid thing again
I casually carried the things I just bought and wandered around the street.
The city is on its lanterns again, but I don't know what to do
After shaking for half a street, I finally bought another women's necklace and a watch for myself, which was almost done to eliminate the money.
Most men don't like shopping, so do I
I just felt that shopping was more tiring than chasing the fugitive. I was about to sit and rest and saw a bar, so I quickly got in.
This is a fan bar, I used to come and have a drink occasionally and check the ball
When I walked into the bar, there were already many fans wearing football uniforms gathered here, divided into two camps, quarreling loudly over a game that had not started yet.
...After all, you can afford to be a ball and jade.
Yes, yes, you are the real ball king. The World Cup qualifiers are only two fewer goals than the violent birds who played football in the Chinese Super League.
The smell of gunpowder and male hormones are emitted in the air
Fans from both camps are very aggressive, but I know nothing big will happen
They are fans of Real Madrid and Barcelona, and they are mortal enemies. They will quarrel almost as soon as they meet, and even occasionally attack, but they will not really cause any serious consequences.
I am on vacation now, just pretending that I have seen nothing, slowly sip a glass of wine, waiting for the upcoming game to begin
But then, I heard a voice that made me feel very disharmonious and unpleasant: ...Pugou blows the sky, there is no fertilizer in the Champions League yet, hahaha, look at your lineup, it is as old as fertilizer.
You guys are so embarrassed to talk about AC Milan...
When I heard the word fertilizer, Wuming immediately became angry. He held the wine glass heavily on the bar and walked towards the tall and strong young man who was laughing proudly with the first word.
Some people immediately realized that there was a chance to watch and started whistling
I ignored others and walked straight to the guy, patted the round table in front of him, stared at him and asked: Who do you think is the fertilizer?
That guy looked at me in casual clothes and laughed: Oh, there are Milan fans Ah these days, you are all fat...
If you can do it, don't force it
Before he finished speaking, I did it
This guy is bigger than me, and I can tell that he has excellent physical strength and other aspects for a long time.
It's a pity that I'm a criminal policeman, a professional
So after two crackling sounds, I pressed him to the ground, pressed his knee against the back of his neck, cut his right arm back, and said angrily: Who do you think is the fertilizer?
I fuck me fuck that guy couldn't move, he was still scolding
Several young people nearby seemed to be his friends, stood up and walked towards us, one of them lifted a stool
I just sneered, took out my hand and shouted: I now suspect that this guy is engaged in drug trafficking, and irrelevant people, don't interfere with my official duties, otherwise it will be a police officer
Everyone present was shocked. For a moment, the guys all stopped, while the others began to retreat involuntarily.
Oh! The owner of the bar finally appeared. After a look, he was sweating profusely: Team Yang, what's going on? I'm just a fan bar, not that kind of nightclub. How could there be drugs? Is there any misunderstanding? Then he looked at the guy under me and sighed: You guy is in trouble. This is Captain Yang of the branch criminal police team. Do you know the bank robbery two days before the serious case? He arrested the robber...
Of course I know there will be no drug circulation here
This bar is actually very healthy, unlike the kind of place that hides dirt and dirt
These young people are just over-energy and have a little bad temper
But it is not the first time I've threatened others so much. Although I didn't really plan to frame this guy, I sneered: Yes, just go to the bureau with me, don't worry. We will notify your family and unit in writing if it won't take more than 48 hours.
This guy was still calling me to complain to you or something, but after hearing my last sentence, he finally became depressed
Notifying his family and unit that he was taken away by the police to investigate the drug case. Even if he was completely innocent, he would not be able to avoid being suspicious and contempt in the future.
I'm really bad
Police, police officer... The young man who was arrogant just now finally lowered his head and his face looked like earth: I have never been exposed to drugs, you know... Yes... Sorry...
I looked at him coldly: Huh?
Then he realized: Sorry, sorry, I am a fertilizer... Ah, I am a yellow dog, a yellow dog...
I let go of my hand, stood up, ignored him, passed through the silent bar with fear, contempt, anger... eyes, returned to the bar, picked up my half glass of wine and drank it all, then took two bills, picked up my things, and left with me
The autumn night wind blows on my cheeks, calming me a little
I know that my behavior is very slutty, I slander others' innocence out of nothing, and bully others by virtue of my power
Although the young man bowed his head and begged for mercy, I was not happy at all
When did I become like this? Why did I become like this?
I sat down on the steps of a cinema on the roadside, lit a cigarette, and spit out a cloud of smoke towards the night sky without stars and only neon lights.
Now I'm really a bad person
Accept bribes, squander the power, squander the money, use public service to private affairs, and be domineering... If Xin'er sees such a brother, she will definitely be disappointed
*********
Ouch, this dead girl is so unlucky... Grandma raised the broom with difficulty and beat her sister with no brains
The thirteen-year-old Xin'er still held her head like she did when she was a child. She was no longer like a reed stalk but a peeled wild rice. Blue and red quickly appeared on her white and smooth arms, but she did not cry, but defended stubbornly: Grandma, don't hit me, I didn't mean it, I didn't know... bleeding
Unlike before, this time, in addition to grievances, Xin'er's face also had two blushings, crisp and gentle, and there was no more tender voice left, and there was also a touch of indescribable shyness.
When I just returned home from junior high school in the town after school, I saw this scene and rushed over and asked: Grandma, what's wrong? Why are you doing?
In fact, grandma rarely hits her sister
She is too old, and her sister has quietly shown herself to be taller than her
She slapped a few times, then stopped her hand with difficulty, turned to an old bed sheet on the ground, and shouted angrily: Binzi, look, this damn girl, making the bed... it's really bad.
Only then did I notice that on the old faded sheet in my heart, there were a large and small patches of blood stained with red blood.
I was startled and shouted in fear: Ha? What's going on? Xin'er has shed so much blood, why are you still hitting her? I rushed towards Xin'er and looked at her anxiously: Why are you making so much blood? What's wrong? Or is it injured? After saying that, he grabbed her soft little hand: I'll take you to the town health center!
Unexpectedly, Xin'er broke free from my hand, lowered her head, and whispered: Brother, brother, don't go to the hospital... Then she said to her grandma: I'll wash myself...
But grandma shouted angrily: Why are you so dirty? You are still at home? Are you not afraid of causing trouble for your brother? You are about to lose it! Unfortunately, this bed sheet... After saying that, she raised the broom in her hand again tremblingly
Xin'er shrank her fair neck and stepped forward to pick up the bed sheet
I looked at the sheet that was half of the area covered by patches, which was older than Xin'er, and even bigger than me, blocked in front of my grandma, and said angrily: This sheet is so broken, and it should be thrown away if it is not dirty. Then buy one for Xin'er.
Grandma shouted angrily: Where did you get the money, Ah?
I already know that although our family is poor, it is not so poor
I was also a little angry: Xin'er has been this old bed sheet until now... It's almost ten years old! It's all broken... She has always used it herself to use it now and buy her a bed sheet... If you don't buy it, I'll give her my new bed sheet.
Grandma can't do anything to me
The older you are, the more so
Seeing that I was angry, I had to put down my broom: OK, okay, little ancestor, can't I buy it?
I am still worried that Xin'er's body is so big that it really shocks me.
I was about to ask again, but Xin'er didn't do the same as before. Every time I spoke for her, I immediately thanked me happily, stuck to me, and showed my intimacy. But for the first time in my life, I rudely asked my grandma another request: I also want to buy sanitary napkins...
sanitary napkin?
I was stunned when I heard this word
At the age of fourteen or fifteen, I am still at a ignorant and curious age. In that closed and backward environment, I still have no idea about these physiological knowledge.
It was not until a moment later that I remembered the female classmates in my class. It seemed that some of them were using this kind of thing.
So... Xin'er's blood is not sick or injured, but a physiological phenomenon that all women will experience.
I opened my mouth wide in surprise, while my grandmother returned to the room angrily. After a moment, she appeared again, throwing a thick, thick piece of cloth onto the sheet in my arms, and shouted in anger: What kind of sanitary napkins should I buy! Take it!
Xin'er glanced at the thing, her face turned redder and her voice was smaller, but her attitude was even more stubborn: Grandma, everyone is using sanitary napkins now, and no one else uses her menstruation to take care of her. Sister Juanjuan and they all say that using this is not good for the health. You buy it for me.
Grandma screamed: Oh, hey, do you still think you are a precious thing? I have used this for a lifetime and I have never seen any disease! A pack of sanitary napkins is more than one yuan, so expensive your father finally found a job on the construction site in the city. The family was just a little more abundant, so you pointed to be a petite lady? I tell you, the door was not fed! You can use it if you use it, and if you don’t need it, you will pull it down... Your brother feels sorry for you and asks me to buy you bed sheets. If you get dirty, I will see that I won’t beat you to death...
My heart lowered my head, and my slender fingers caught the dirty and ugly piece of cloth like a spasm.
A shiny tears fell on the cloth and disappeared in an instant
At that time, I was in a state of short-circuiting my brain
When I realized that Xin'er had her first period and should have used some basic daily necessities, my grandmother had already returned to the inner room with cursing, while Xin'er quietly left the house.
I ran out to find her
A moment later, I saw her at the entrance of the village
She sat on a big rock, lowered her head, holding the menstrual belt in her hand, and her slender body was trembling violently.
Xin'er When I called by her side, Xin'er raised her head, her face was covered with shiny tears, and she sobbed in anger: Brother, brother, I don't want to be a petite lady
This is the second time Xin'er cried
Just like last time, it upset me
Of course I know she is not
She is not just a petite lady, her grandmother is so mean to her, and her life is not even as good as a girl.
As a teenager, I have begun to understand right and wrong, and how unfair my grandmother and I were to her before
I wanted to go back to my grandma and ask her to buy sanitary napkins for Xin'er, but I felt a little instinctively embarrassed, and a kind of instinctive aura that I was already old and should not be fooled with my grandma anymore.
So I snatched the menstrual belt in Xin'er's hand without hesitation and threw it into the grass on the roadside
Then I pulled up a slender and soft little hand: Go to town, my brother will buy it for you
Xin'er opened her tears in surprise, hesitated, and retreated a little: Brother, brother...
I pretended to be strange and asked: What's wrong, don't you want to buy it?
No, no, Xin'er shook her little head and stammered, her expression had changed from sadness to shame: That, that...no...my brother is a man...that's very expensive...
At that moment, I showed that I looked like my brother the most in my life, and smiled with my nose up: What's good? We don't have a mother... Who bought you my money? Last time the school held a sports meeting, my grandma gave me ten yuan, and there were six yuan left for me. I originally wanted to take you to the video hall in the town tomorrow to watch the video and eat together.
Xin'er's face was slightly red, she was a little uneasy, but she couldn't suppress her happiness: OK, OK...
I touched her head and smiled: Then wait here, I'll ride my bike here
Yes! Xin'er nodded vigorously
So I turned around and ran to the door
It was already the beginning of the new century, and this country began to accelerate its urbanization process
Making constructions everywhere, tall buildings are rushing to emerge on the vast land
Thanks to the blessing of the environment, my father was able to get rid of the life of short-term work
Several nearby villages organized a construction team, and my father became a migrant worker
Although there are still many problems, no matter what, my family is no longer so poor
When I arrived in junior high school in town, my father could buy me a bicycle
I was pushing the bicycle toward the entrance of the village now, but I felt a little confused in my heart
It has been two years since I started in junior high school
Because my sister is still in elementary school, I no longer go to school with her like before in the past two years, get off school and play together like before.
Even at night I have to go to self-study. When I get home on a bicycle, I often have to meet my sister, say hello and go to bed.
We have been together suddenly and I have not paid much attention to her because my horizons are gradually broadening.
It was not until just now that I suddenly discovered this fact that surprised me:
In the past two years when I didn't notice her, she had grown up secretly
How did that little thing grow up?
When did she grow up?
What will happen to her when she grows up?
Beyond my confusion, I was also a little worried.
When she grows up, will she marry someone else as her wife?
Will it be my little thing anymore?
This hateful little thing actually grew up secretly while I was not paying attention
No, she hasn't grown up yet...
She has grown up
I know
Although the teacher never attends physiological and hygiene classes, I also learned a little bit of physiological knowledge.
Girls are different from boys. Girls grow up, which is a landmark event...
When I pushed the bicycle and saw my pretty sister standing at the entrance of the village, I understood that she had really grown up
That little thing that always shrinks into a ball has become a memory
If a 10-year-old sister is like a green willow branch, the thirteen-year-old sister in front of her is completely a gently swaying willow branch
Although it is still so slender and even a little thin, its slender body has already supported the girl's pose
The part I occasionally expect seems to have nothing, but Yingying's waist has begun to outline a graceful curve.
The moving willow branches were shaking in front of me, ripples in my heart
She greeted me lightly, her black and shiny short hair fluttering gently in her ears
Neat bangs cover the smooth forehead, and the emerald eyebrows are still big and bright eyes
These eyes are now getting gentler, and a pool of green spring water flows between the black and white.
I don't know when the bridge of the nose became tall and straightened, and the light red and petal-like lips were as beautiful as ever.
Only the baby fat with her cheeks and chin was still a little chubby, told me she was still a childish child
Brother, what's on my face? Xin'er suddenly stopped and stretched out her little hand to rub her face
After I was stunned, I quickly laughed: Nothing, nothing. After a pause, I said in a complicated mood: You have grown up
A faint blush appeared on her white and tender cheeks. Xin'er looked at me embarrassedly and turned her head away
I laughed quickly: Come on, get in the car
Xin'er clumsyly sat down in the back of the bicycle, and then tightly sat on my waist
I remember I rarely take her on a bicycle
She was a little nervous and hugged me tightly. When I started pedaling, she even trembled and pressed on my back.
I was immediately distracted
The warm and moist breath passed through the warp and weft lines of the single clothes, gently scratching the small piece of skin on my back, bringing a strange itchy
And her skin is different from before, through her clothes.
Still soft and warm, but now there is a strange slippery and indescribable elasticity
What's even more terrible is that I felt that there seemed to be something on the washboard that was leaning against me.
There is indeed something more
Two small, soft balls, like two naughty little animals, slipping through the clothes, gently rubbing against me one after another, making me sweaty, rubbing my whole body stiff, and making my heart sway
Just when I was feeling uncomfortable, my heart finally spoke gently, diverting my attention: Do you brother don’t like me growing up?
I was stunned and quickly laughed: It's either Ah, I just thought that when you grow up, you will marry someone else as your wife
Xin'er's cheeks were tightly pressed against my back: I'm not married, I've been with my brother all the time
After a moment, I replied with difficulty: Good Ah
I didn't think too much at that time
In that feudal and backward environment, people around us rarely talk about things between men and women, and no one tells us what to do and what not to do
I never thought about anything. Xin'er is my sister. We can't be together all the time. Instead, I feel very happy and relieved.
Although I was a little worried, it was also fleeting
Xin'er seemed to be thinking about something, so we rarely talked about it all the way
It was not until the entrance of a larger grocery store in the town that Xin'er asked nervously again: What kind of thing should I buy?
How could I know these things
After parked the car, he felt embarrassed to enter the door. He Xin'er stood at the door and asked: Have you never asked you Sister Juanjuan and the others before.
Xin'er shook her head: I rarely see them now
There's really no way
This knowledge should have been taught by mothers or other female elders, but we only have an old and stupid grandma
, I can only rely on my brother, to discuss and study such things with her
After thinking for a while, I had no idea and had to say: Go and ask
Xin'er's cheeks were red, and she seemed to be unable to take steps
I knew she was embarrassed and smiled: Let's go and ask together. After that, I pulled her little hand and walked into the grocery store.
Fortunately, our town is very small, and almost everyone in the town has contacted each other, and the owner of this grocery store is also a warm woman I have ever met.
After a long mess of conversations such as wings, side leakage, flow, etc., we chose a pack
Xin'er immediately couldn't wait to ask the shop owner to borrow the toilet for use
After asking, the owner said with a smile: Now I'm putting toilet paper? Then go and change it if I don't call me again, I'll teach you
After Xin'er grabbed the pack of sanitary napkins, she ran into the store
The woman looked at me and was amazed: This is the first time I have seen such a young man like this with my own sister...Aren't you afraid of bad luck?
I shook my head blankly: What a bad luck... I don't understand
No adults in your family teach her? The woman suddenly seemed a little angry
I quickly explained: My mom is no longer here, my dad is working in the city
Not easy...not easy. The woman then felt relieved: It's a blessing for that girl to have a brother like you.
I waved my hand embarrassedly, and then I heard Xin'er's low call
Sure enough, it was still a bit troublesome if you used it for the first time without anyone's guidance.
So the owner went into the inner room and came out with Xin'er for a while. He smiled and said: OK, remember Ah, you have to stick it there, otherwise it will easily become a bun.
Thank you auntie, let's thank you together
Then Xin'er walked to me with a red face and shouted in a low voice: Brother
I touched her head and smiled and said: Have you changed? Then let's go back
After thanking again, we left the grocery store
And when we got home, I found something was wrong with her.
After getting off the bike, she kept covering her belly, her little face turned pale
When I asked her anxiously, she replied weakly: It hurts...
Grandma went out, but I didn't have much money, so I didn't dare to take her to the hospital again, so I could only hurriedly run to find a barefoot doctor in the village.
After he asked a few questions, he said with a smile: This is dysmenorrhea, most women feel a little uncomfortable when they first menstruate. It is normal. If you let her lie down and rest well, fry some brown sugar water for her, it hurts so much that it can't stand it. Let's go to the town health center to have a look.
I didn't understand his words very well and didn't dare to neglect them. After I got home, I quickly let Xin'er lie down on my bed, and then clumsily brewed her brown sugar water.
After drinking, my heart looked a little more comfortable, but I was worried about her situation, so I stayed by the bed with her
Brother, if you sing to me, I will fall asleep. Although Xin'er wants to sleep for a while, she can't sleep.
After a long struggle, I whispered a willful request in a low voice.
I was a little embarrassed for a moment, and I wanted to refuse in a conditioned manner
A 14 or 15-year-old boy may be difficult to do such a shameful thing
But Xin'er looked at me eagerly, her big eyes lost their luster, and her little face was also dyed with an unnatural flush between the pale, which made me unable to refuse
Finally, I turned my head embarrassedly and said stammeringly: I can't sing
Brother Xin'er reached out to grab my sleeve and pulled it weakly: If you know how to sing Ah, then I will teach you that...
I did learn that song through my interactions with my sister, and I often hum a few words.
So there was nothing to refuse, so I had to endure the burning heat on my cheeks and said stiffly: OK, then you go to bed quickly, then take a breath and swallow, and finally sang in a low voice: Brother Dog, save me quickly...
What I sing must be very ugly, right?
I know I don't sing well, and I'm often laughed at by my friends
But Xin'er doesn't think so
She quickly calmed down with my singing. Her slender body was originally tense and even curled up slightly, but now it has relaxed without realizing it.
When I sang the second time, those beautiful big eyes had closed slightly, and the long eyelashes were still hidden, looking at me with attachment, as if I was reluctant to close it, and I didn't want me to disappear from her vision
At that time, I must have been perfect in her blurry sight, right?
Tall, powerful, careful, gentle, kind, upright, patient... Protect her, take care of her, care for her, and make reasonable requests from her grandmother for justice, saving her money for her to buy things for her...
I don't know how long it took, but after she made a slight and slight breathing, I stopped singing and looked at this stable sleeping face with a smile.
It was the first time since she came to me that I had looked at her so carefully after she fell asleep
Although I was a little tired, I didn't feel impatient at all. Instead, I felt very warm in my heart. I thought I could watch it for a while
Until it was dark, I stood up and looked at the smooth and delicate cheeks that were shining in the twilight. Suddenly, I couldn't control my inexplicable impulse and leaned over and kissed her quickly on the face.
A smooth and soft touch came from the lips, which was like an electric current spreading to the whole body.
I raised my head like a thief and looked at Xin'er guiltily.
But she slept soundly and peacefully, and a beautiful smile quietly appeared on her face.
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